Failing with style

If, like me, you loved Toy Story, you’ll know the quote, ‘That wasn’t flying. That was falling, with style.’  

So many of us don’t reach out for the things we want because we are afraid to fail, both in business and at home.  I know if you are in leadership, you probably think that you aren’t susceptible to this; you built a company, blah blah blah, but honestly, we all are. We are all fallible human beings who worry about failing. 

I am exactly the sort of person who will try almost anything. Almost I say because I won’t bungee jump – I know too many people who never felt right again – and I won’t do anything I know I categorically won’t like. I feel that at 51, I have earned the right to roughly know what I do and don’t like. I’ve eaten live green ants from a tree in Australia, bathed my best friend's python in her sink and braved the ghost train on Brighton pier – never, never again! 

I tend to view the world as a huge bucket list. Have I tried this? Do I want to try this? Will it kill me? If not then I’ll be likely to give it a go in business or otherwise. There are lots of things I’ve done once that I wouldn’t do again because they didn’t grab my attention enough or because I’m frankly useless at them. Take, for example, water skiing.  

On a beautiful island setting in the Maldives years ago, I watched as others simply stood up and skied. I, however, could not…every time the boat pulled away, I would just flip from sitting on my bottom in the water to being dragged along face first like a human surfboard, like snorkelling at speed, much to the delight of onlookers who later told me that it was the best part of their day.  

It didn’t matter what handhold they gave me. As soon as the boat started, I flipped over, panicked for a few meters while unintentionally waterboarding myself, and finally lost my grip on the handle and let go. I have small hands and simply couldn’t hold on tight enough. There’s a family joke that all the girls have weak arms. I can’t swing from monkey bars or hold my own weight, so maybe that’s true.  

I’m still glad I tried it, though, because I’d rather reflect from the end of my life that I tried things, than didn’t. The key to success here is – don’t worry about which list the things you try end up on. Whether it’s the gosh I’m terrible at that list or the that was fantastic list. I see it all as learning about myself.  

Here are some things I’m terrible at.  

  • Any sort of preparation before decorating. I do not have the patience.  

  • Making pottery with my hands – unless I’m happy with it looking like pre-school. 

  • Running – I hate being out of breath. 

  • Staying on my own at night in strange places – my imagination just takes over.  

  • Drawing. I once showed my daughter a stick man I had drawn for a presentation, and she said, ‘you haven’t shown this publicly, have you?’  (All the drawings in my book are created by her).  

What are you terrible at?  

I really don’t mind because there are lots of things I’m good at. Communication, making friends, making a fool of myself without minding, gardening, my job, and trying again.  

I fully embrace Buzz Lightyear's ‘falling with style’ approach. Have a go, and if it doesn’t work, own up to it, celebrate it and fail with style.  

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The ghost in the woods 

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Alone surrounded by people